Somehow in conversation, Mister Rodgers came up. I realized he was so important because he made me feel important, and loved for who i was. For once i didn't feel weird about being sensitive, He went out of his way to make me feel like i was a part of his every day lives.
    Around the time i was watching Mister Rodgers, an important man came to be in my life. My mother's father died when she was five. When i was about five i was introducted to my step grandfather. For some reason this man show me for who i was. He could see through the outside of me and know i had a heart of gold inside of me. He went out of his way to make sure me and my family were taken care of. In many ways, he was a hero to me. This man was called papaw and in  every way desereved his title from me. He had lots of biological grandchildren but i was made to feel just as special. Sadly the world lost a great man too early. Much like Mister Rogers my grandfather's life was taken way too soon. Bone cancer slowly ate away at the man i so much admired. I walked into his hospital room. he was delirious eith pain meds, and he said "there is my little girl" I have been waiting on you. thatnks for coming to see me. I can't swear he said my name, I can't swear he even really knew who i was, but it meant the world to the eight year old that never really could find her place. My grandfather's love lasted a long time in my heart. After the years passed he had been gone longer than he was in my life. The impact of his kindness still remains. my mom told me grandpaw was in heaven taming wild lions and tigers for me to play with when i was finally ready to go to heaven. At night i woul look up at the stars and tell God to tell grandpa things for me.  I don't know how that works, but it makes me happy thinking about it. My dog cocoa and i would sit for hourrs on the porch of my grandfathers home in which he allowed my family to stay rent free. he also made a way for it to be ours even after he passed. MY parents never left that home untill right before my grandmother passed. The home was given back to his biological home. I am forever greatful to have grown up in a rural area outside of the city limits where I could catch fifrefire and admire the stars. The eight year old in me wouldn't have survived with out that home and the land. I needed it to grow up on and grandpa knew that.
    I sti here typing from a computer in my former grandmother's home this is the house my mother grew up in.my parents are allowing my kids to grow up in a house outside of city limits. They can catch fire fly and look at the stars. They can hold their dogs adn talk to the stars. :) They have the blessing of seeing their great grandmother every day in this home and in the yard.